Wednesday, October 16, 2013

chicken scratch

Once upon a time there was an eagle that thought it was a chicken. His name was Howie. Howie lived in a chicken coop and spent its days scratching around in the dirt with the other chickens in a fenced-in pen on a farm. Sometimes he wondered why he seemed to look and feel different than all the other chickens, but he had enough food to eat, and was kept safe and warm in the coop, so he decided this was his happy safe little place in life, so he just settled for the life of a chicken. Ignored the restlessness in his wings, that feeling that he was meant for something different, something that would give him a much greater view of things, something that would feel more like his true calling. The other chickens told him that there were wolves outside the pen, and other scary things that might hurt them, so he just took their advice and didn't try anything risky.

Then one day a real eagle went flying by, circled overhead, and landed with a flutter just outside the chicken coop. The chickens all scattered away from the fence, but Howie just stood there, mesmerized by this strange, somewhat familiar-looking creature that was standing there staring at him. There seemed a sense of connection, but Howie couldn't tell what it was. And besides, he was just a chicken, he thought. The other eagle's name was Ricardo. "Hey!" said Ricardo. "What are you doing in a chicken coop?" To which Howie explained that this was his home, of course, because he was a chicken. Ricardo shook his head and tried to convince Howie otherwise, but Howie kept reminding him of the dangers that lurked out in the wild, and how he was kept safe and warm on the farm so why should he desire anything else?

This went on for a long time, with Ricardo visiting Howie often, just to chat. They had a lot of things in common, of course, so talk came easy, though Howie couldn't put his finger, er, his talon on what it was that made them so alike. Ricardo would often encourage Howie to spread his wings and try to fly, but Howie would just say "oh, no, no, no, I couldn't do that...besides, what would all the other chickens think of me?"

One day after a heavy rain, Ricardo came soaring out from the woods, circled the farm as usual, and fluttered down next to a large mud puddle next to the chicken pen. "Howie! Howie!" he called. "Come and look!" Howie pecked his way over to the fence, where he could see the deep water of the mud puddle glistening and reflecting the sky on this clear sunny day. Ricardo excitedly motioned for Howie to move closer and take a good look at the mirror-like reflection in the puddle. So Howie looked, and when he saw that his reflection looked almost identical to Ricardo's, he suddenly realized the truth: he was not a chicken after all; he was an eagle! A beautiful, majestic eagle that longed to soar through the sky and fly beyond the confines of this farm, to use his gifts and talents to reach places he never before dreamed he could go, to courageously venture into new territory, conquer his fears and live the adventure of a lifetime with his buddy Ricardo.

And that's the end of a rather cheesy story that I hope is also a bit encouraging. We can all be eagles. We just need a little encouragement.

 

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Feel this moment

Later when my coffee's brewing

I'll be in my green apron doin'

Something dumb but till my drive-thru's open

I just wanna feel this moment..

whooa-oh-oh-ohhhhhhhh,

I just wanna feel this moment,

ohhhh, ohhh-oh-ohhhhh,

I just wanna feel this moment.

doo-doo-doo-doot-doot-doot-doot-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doot-doot-doot-doot-doot-doo-doo-doo-doo.... (are you keeping up on these doots with me??) :-)

i think i need sleep....

 

 

 

Random haiku

Sometimes when i think
About my life i just shake
My head and laugh. Ha!

Sunday, October 13, 2013

Slaughterhouse PNC

A cold-sensitive introvert with anxiety, panic issues,  phobias of large crowds & heights  & no interest in team sports should not have to go to a Hurricanes game. Just sayin.

Like a sheep being led to the slaughter...

I open not my mouth. (It's frozen shut, teeth chattering...)

Liar

"Is everything ok?"
"Yeah."
Why am i such a liar?

Friday, October 11, 2013

Overcomer

 

I just had to share this video link again.. Awesome, awesome video of Mandisa's song "Overcomer".
The music, the testimonies of celebrities, the sports metaphors, and most of all the message that we are Overcomers in Christ Jesus.

Please take a couple minutes and enjoy this bit of inspiration:

http://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=b8VoUYtx0kw&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3Db8VoUYtx0kw%26feature%3Dyoutu.be

Love it. I may not be where I want to be, but there is a ray of hope.

Stay in the fight til the final round..
 
"Overcomer"

Staring at a stop sign
Watching people drive by
T Mac on the radio
Got so much on your mind
Nothing's really going right
Looking for a ray of hope

Whatever it is you may be going through
I know He's not gonna let it get the best of you

You're an overcomer
Stay in the fight ‘til the final round
You're not going under
‘Cause God is holding you right now
You might be down for a moment
Feeling like it's hopeless
That's when He reminds You
That you're an overcomer
You're an overcomer

Everybody's been down
Hit the bottom, hit the ground
Oh, you're not alone
Just take a breath, don't forget
Hang on to His promises
He wants You to know

The same Man, the Great I am
The one who overcame death
Is living inside of You
So just hold tight, fix your eyes
On the one who holds your life
There's nothing He can't do
He's telling You

 

 

 

 

Thursday, October 10, 2013

inside the rain cloud

 

Haiku:

sweaty combat class

shower, pouring rain, these are

all places to hide.

_______________

Lyrics on the way to the gym...just like a one-winged dove....even the best fall down sometimes, even wrong words seem to rhyme, stars refuse to shine.....joke was on me, cold, hard ground...(reminds me, yes, the joke was on me. why does a mind & a heart refuse to believe what it doesn't want to believe?) Then at the gym, 3 songs by Fall Out Boy. Feeling like Fall Out Girl here.

New and old techniques in combat class: e-kick, ascending & descending elbow strikes, baller brawl, or is it ball brawler, or just brawler, i dunno, more complex karate combos: punch, guard, back kick, knee...

"Imagine your opponent...target the nose, lip, and chin.." (oh yes, I'm imagining it...don't even get me started!) Feeling especially mean today. Like the fire in me for fighting is no longer sweetened with niceness. nope. goodbye miss nice guy. ok, i'm still nice for my kids & my kitties, a few others, but today, i'm seeing the bad & the ugly side.

Why do I even do this? I can stop certain habits, but this one, I can't stop it. It's like I'm a muse to myself. Gotta throw my words out there. It's a faith thing. Like prayer. I know there's a God up there who hears my prayers and cares. And somehow I like to believe that there's a kindred spirit out there who hears and cares about this garbage, too. Even a complete stranger in Botswana or Tokyo or Berlin. doesn't matter. I really should start writing novels. Fiction about criminals, murder, adventure, death, emotional drama, get this stuff out of my head and into anonymous characters who don't really exist. But sometimes truth is stranger than fiction.

And time for another expensive conversation. At least one real person hears me. and cares.

 

24 hours

Minutes & inches from a car crash destroying me
Other car dies one day after getting it fixed. While at a Bible study.
Microwave dies.
Roof leaks.
My heart dies.
All in 24 hours.
Coincidence?
Or spiritual attack?

21 days

I feel so stupid.
But it only takes three weeks
To change a habit.

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Haikus by flashlight

 

Is it possible
for the heart to hurt this bad
and still be alive?
**************
solitude sweetness
my heart beats for you alone,
Lord, for you alone.
****************
(somewhere in the Psalms...)
Search me O my God
Test every thought within me
Show me anything
that grieves your heart.
Search me O my God,
Test every thought within me.
Lead me in Your ways,
Forever, My God.
How precious are your thoughts to me, O Lord, my God,
Even when I wake You're there with me.
No matter where I go, O Lord,
You're always there with me,
Before I was born
You planned each day for me,
Before I was born,
You planned each day for me,
My God.