Thursday, June 27, 2013

melancholy pancakes & muay thai mayhem

pancakes for lunch today. just because. with black coffee.
mood-meter for today: melancholy. not going-off-the-rails-on-this-crazy-train depressed like i was a few days ago, just sad. melancholy. thoughtful. my shark tooth necklace has a "mood bead" on it, its color is blue today. Pandora seems to recognize my mood, is playing all my favorite melancholy songs, like "Come Away" by Jesus Culture & "Zombie" by the Cranberries.
but as always, on thursdays i like to share what i learned in my body combat class, so here goes:
first of all, "Mr. Bob" has an online presence on facebook, just look up "pumpdiva". yes, you read that right: pump, as in body pump class, and diva, as in a queen-like persona. nuff said.so if we "friend" him, we become part of his Mad Cary Mom club online. can give him requests for favorite body combat tracks we wannna do next time. he says "welcome to the jungle, we've got fun and games.."
so let the fun and games begin. did a variety of oldie-but-goodie tracks today, lots of requests. one of my favorites was this all-kicking sequence done to Alesha Dixon's "I need a drummer boy". cute song. here's a link to the very same kicking choreography we did in class this morning, and, in case you're counting, that's 222 kicks!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nLCz6UHhNo&feature=youtube_gdata_player

while we're doing this, Mr. Bob yells, "any drama boys out there?...yeah, i know the words are drummer boy, but i'm always the drama boy in my house!" i can imagine...

i loved the muay thai track. the song was this horribly delicious assault of pure thrashing mayhem, 3 minutes of the least-musical, least-lyrical noise i have ever heard, and played at painful decibels that matched the intensity of the work-out. also covered up our yells on the jumping strikes. for a second i'd remembered the name of one of the strikes and was so proud to be able to share it with you, but alas, there goes my ADD brain again, forgot it again. oh well. one was a vertical knee strike, plugged in-between a bunch of elbow strikes. LOTS of elbow strikes. he explained that a proper elbow strike will start at the top corner of the head and crack the skull, move down diagonally and break the nose, shatter the cheekbone and throw out a few teeth. And who says this stuff is too aggressive???? I loved it when he added the jumps and yells to our strikes, seeing the air beneath us as we leaped a foot off the ground, "hhhyyyyyyyaaaaahhh!!"

So. Much. Fun.

afterwards, as i try to compose myself and return to the room where the Body Flow class has already begun, I take my place on my mat and breathe in the "zen" of the dimly lit studio, flowing movements and monastery-like music. hmmm, a monastery. that's where i need to be. my inspiration for the day. if i could only be a nun. spend my days in a monastery, living in silent isolation much of my days, except for interacting with the world as a missionary. but forget the black and white "hobbit" thingy they wear or whatever, i couldn't wear that. too cumbersome. just like i could never wear those bathrobe-like martial arts robes. sorry. it's just not me. to live like mother teresa. sure, i know that no "works" i do on earth will ever pay for what Jesus did on the cross for me, I know that. but at least it might bring less judgement upon me from the world, if they see that my departure from ordinary life is for a noble cause..... just crazy thoughts. it's all i've got right now.

 

 

 

 

 

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

gassy kids & scorpions

The things you hear in the women's locker room at the gym. so funny. This other Mad Cary Mom (she's also in my Body Combat class) is telling us how her kids just discovered that you can set off your carbon monoxide detector alarm by farting on it. oh my! If my kids find out how to do that, it might even send in the fire department, to whom we must admit, "uh, sorry, guys, no fire, that was just my kids passing gas!!"
So then of course I've got that crazy idea in my head when I go to Body Flow class. And as the lights are dim, we're all focused & quiet in our pilates plank position on the floor, I suddenly smell something foul, and immediately my mind chimes in, "let's hope they don't have a carbon monoxide detector in here!" That's where I lose it, and I'm grinding my face into the floor, trying desperately to stifle my giggles and guffaws. Am i the only one who has inappropriate thoughts during un-funny situations and then has to squash my head into the ground to keep from laughing out loud? ay yi yi.
As we continue our progression through pilates stretches & yoga poses, I have another "eureka!" moment as I'm sitting in this ridiculous pretzel pose, waiting for someone to shake salt on me and bake me... A favorite song comes on that helps me focus and keep my balance, it's "Breathe" by Anna Nalick

2 AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake,
"Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?,.........

'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button, girl.
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe... just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe...........

There's a light at each end of this tunnel,
You shout 'cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out
And these mistakes you've made, you'll just make them again
If you'd only try turning around.

2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me,
Threatening the life it belongs to
And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd
Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud
And I know that you'll use them, however you want to

But you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button now
Sing it if you understand.
and breathe, just breathe
woah breathe, just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe.

 

___________________________________

love that song. really resonates with me. just breathe. head in my hands. these words are my diary, screaming out loud.

Singing these lyrics to myself is helping me focus and keep my balance as I stand on one foot and stretch the other leg in various

positions. Need to go home and look up the guitar chords for that song, try it on my own. Then I'm thinking that I really should get the music out of me and start writing my own songs. Take these words I write and bang them out on the guitar somehow. hmmm, what are my music-making tools, I wonder. A very old guitar that I got as a trade-in for my violin after high school, so old that everyone tells me i need a new one but I've got too many old camp memories strummed into this thing that I can't let go. I don't remember much music theory from the 12 years (combined) of playing violin and french horn, but I think these songs will require lots of minor chords. just my mood these days.

 

Now we're practicing a split stretch. wow, haven't done this in years. if i keep doing this, maybe i can learn how to do this:

 

That's Chloe Bruce demonstrating her wicked scorpion kick. Soooo cool.
Enjoyed watching multiple youtube videos of her yesterday. Chloe, you are my new hero! Here's a couple links, one of her and some breakdancers performing with phone books, and one of another chick (Dominic Monaghan) knocking out a guy with her venomous kick. Lovin it!!!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWvz2QyR1-o&feature=youtube_gdata_player

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ISCS6pv_yiQ&feature=youtube_gdata_player

 

I may not ever be the next Chloe Bruce, but maybe one day I'll break a record for the OLDEST woman to even attempt a scorpion kick! hah!!!

 
 

well I really have more rant to unravel here, but the heat of the day and this last photo are reminding me that it's time to get out to a pool, for some ultraviolet rays and water therapy. see ya!!!

 
 
 

 

Monday, June 24, 2013

my selfish dream

if i could just do what i wanted...

and nobody here needed me to stay...

i would move across the country or better yet,

across the world.

rent a cute small place

walking distance to a warm beach,

work a simple job.

adopt a bunch of pets.

plant a garden.

surround myself with music, art..

dance, yoga, work-out, swim, surf,

walk my dog...

sometimes go out dancing

salsa, merengue...

make friends

no commitments, no complications..

just pure island getaway therapy.

ahh, so selfish, so indulgent.

when i come to the end of this selfish phase,

I'd start over.

let God re-create my heart

and my connections.

connections based on my true Healed self.

not a facade.

just a dream.

maybe when i'm old. (er).

i'll start packing.

 

 

Sunday, June 23, 2013

Amy grant tweet

Amy Grant (@amygrant) tweeted at 6:30 PM on Sun, May 19, 2013: http://t.co/P5WlOrfByT (https://twitter.com/amygrant/status/336247505878663169) Get the official Twitter app at https://twitter.com/download
Amy Grant (@amygrant) tweeted at 10:15 PM on Thu, May 09, 2013:
http://t.co/1VOzQbEqHA
(https://twitter.com/amygrant/status/332680382870863872)

Get the official Twitter app at https://twitter.com/download

Good article on depression

Brad Hambrick (@BradHambrick) tweeted at 1:06 PM on Sun, Jun 23, 2013: Depression: Belief-Behavior and/or Body-Brain? http://t.co/dNC01hp8z8 (https://twitter.com/BradHambrick/status/348849634602516480) Get the official Twitter app at https://twitter.com/download

Stoplights (on a pleasant sunday afternoon)

 

driving in the rain

happiness bubbling, babbling in backseat

excited to get kitties

meanwhile up front

at every red light

scribbling dark words

madness perches

on my shoulder

whispering threats

painting colors of doom

so sorry

but these words won't release me

until i let them go

***************************************

I walk to the edge

and look down

close my eyes

can't look at the faces

of those i love

see their pain

or their disapproving frowns

their shaking fingers

plug my ears

can't listen to the cries

of those who will miss me

of those i've hurt, let down

or the condemning voices

eyes, ears, closed.

lungs open.

strong, brave,

ready.

i jump.

falling,

sinking,

pain.

push down the panic

push push push

O God what am i doing

push push push

losing sensation

light fade to black

voices, tears,

Replaced

by light

glorious light

i have arrived.

********************************

The Alternative:

pretend the sky is blue

shut off my brain

switch off the emotions

auto-pilot, robot.

create a scene

rehearse a revival

act it out

recite my lines

a perfect performance

then return

to that night

where i'm no longer my own

voice ripped out, thrown away

yes sir, yes ma'am

whatever you say

degraded to filth

my new identity

don't deserve more

act out new identity

settle. hide hide hide

what's that you say?

punish. shut up.

this is all you get.

suck it up.

get over it.

grow up.

it's all in your head.

can i return to the womb?

is there a reverse switch?

or just an emergency exit?

outta here.

 

 

Radioactive

 

 

Just discovered some new cool music, had to share... it's Imagine Dragon's "Radioactive". Love the eerie feeling of this song, and it also makes me wish I'd kept up the violin as a teen. Lindsey's great.

 

Check out this video on YouTube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=An3G5g2b7Rg&feature=youtube_gdata_player

 

ooh! ooh! ooh! just one more!! so awesome, Lindsey & Tyler also do this great re-make of Thrift Shop!!! lovin it!!!

Check out this video on YouTube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ke-sS8dPKk&feature=youtube_gdata_player

sorry, but had to share one more....love the dancing with zombies in the graveyard. I wonder if Lindsey ever went through the season of "it just ain't cool to be in orchestra" as a teen... wish I hadn't dropped out. She rocks that violin!!

Check out this video on YouTube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dfZ9BXaNyE&feature=youtube_gdata_player

 

ok, so while the rest of the normal world sleeps, i am having too much fun on YouTube. (thanks, Anomynous friend, for sharing this group with me!!)

Sun's gonna be up soon, gotta get some sleep. :-)


 

Friday, June 21, 2013

nu thang

I think i'm in love...

ok, having said that, let me give a little clarification/disclaimer: The following is basically a first-timer's critique of a particular local boxing establishment, or gym. So the "love" is in the feeling of that glove, and of that glove-to-bag contact of that first of many punches I threw today. ahh, sweet love. Now there were things about the place itself that were, at this point, just "likes". But let me just settle in on the "love" factor...

This "love" started when the owner guy wrapped up my hands and handed me a pair of loaner gloves.(no, not with the guy, silly, the gloves!!!) I'll eventually need to buy my own gloves, and learn how to wrap my own hands, too. wow. I'm feeling tough and ready to slug someone already!!!
So the kickboxing class begins. Compared to my Body Combat at my gym where I'm a member, this is a much smaller class, maybe about 10 of us, half men, half women. Unlike my Body Combat, this is not choreographed, but is more of a series of drills, boot camp-style. He barks out the orders, and a lot of the participants actually bark back, "Sir!!" What is this, the Army? So we warm-up without the gloves, doing all sorts of stuff, like burpies, and basic calisthenics. I'm feeling a little let-down, as I love the fun choreography of Mr. Bob's class, but I'm keeping an open mind here..
Then we glove up and go to the 150-lb. bags just waiting for us to punch the "help" out of 'em. That's where I was humbled. I thought I was pretty tough from doing Body Combat, and yes, I will still rave about the muscular benefits of that class, but these bags turned me into a crying baby running for its mommy. almost. I mean, this hurt! Good thing my knuckles were wrapped as tightly as they were, but I could tell I needed more practice to strengthen these baby fists! And kicking these things, ouch!

 
Now here I have to add that I was a bit disappointed that the instructor didn't keep up with us on these exercises, he would just demo them, quite impressively, I might add, but then he just stood there and watched us, yelling at us to work it, work it, while I"m thinking "c'mon buddy, let's see you try this!" (actually I shouldn't criticize, the guy's got great credentials, is a kickboxing champion in his event...) but I liked that in Body Combat the instructor never stops doing it with us.
ok, so he's breaking the bag-time into separate drills. One of them has us partnering up with someone nearby to do this relay race-type of thing. I'm with this cute thang next to me, this perky girl who reminds me of someone at my church. Hmm, maybe I should invite this girl sometime...anyway... The drill is for partner #1 to sprint across the room, hammer into a bag 10 times, sprint back and tag your partner who then does the same. Over and over and over. Very aerobically challenging, plus the guy is standing right next to my bag that I'm hitting, & the longer this goes on I"m tempted to "accidentally" miss the bag a few times. I swear he's got that timer set on a longer 5 minutes than God ever created. When it finally beeps, he rewards the winning team (a couple of chicks!) the relief of a smaller number of push-ups than the rest of us. oh well.
We return to our own bags, and he comes around wearing these catcher's mitt-like gloves, where each of us gets our turn to face him and give him all the punches we can handle, or that he can handle. I love this part!! I actually see him backing up as I smack into his gloves, yes, folks, I am pushing him back into the ropes... and I love when I see that slight flicker of fear when my glove almost misses his glove and comes that close to pummeling his nose and wiping off that lazy, cat-eating-fish grin of his. (oh i wish!)

After 30 minutes on the bags, we take off the gloves and do more conditioning exercises, most of which are done in the push-up position. (how does he dream up so many variations of the basic push-up? this is insane! cruel, I tell you!!) We also add dumbells or kettle balls, and as usual, he just stands there and picks on us if we dare rest our arms for a second. meanie. But really the camaraderie here is fun. Since we're not as focused on keeping up with a beat-by-beat choreographed routine, and it's a smaller class, there's a lot of joking around and getting to know the other inmates, I mean classmates, better. I like that part.
Class finally ends, and I have to return my wraps and gloves. I end up sticking around for a half hour, talking more to the owner and that instructor who's still hangin around. I learn more about their program and am happy that they are taking up my advice to contact my Body Combat teacher about teaching some of his classes here, since they were already planning to add BC to their schedule. I can't commit to a dual membership at this time, but will certainly be back often for that satisfying smack of the glove into the bag. Or another person, if I'm lucky. Nice that they have class package deals, without having to be a member. I buy a pair of wraps but will have to wait on the particular color of glove that I want, not in stock. Might check out Dick's Sporting Goods.
So that's it. My new love. If only real love were as uncomplicated as donning a set of gloves and blazing into a punch bag. that'd be easy. goodnight, y'all!
 
 

 

 

 

 

Thursday, June 20, 2013

Body Combat on youtube!!

*****IMPORTANT UPDATE to the TREE POSE post...

Just found this video on YouTube, it's the karate track we did in class today, only these people are obviously not in Cary, but somewhere in Latin America, I'm guessing. Check it out! The very same choreography that we do!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qvB7hZPg9Y&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Hope you enjoy! :-)

 

 

Tree pose

Happy Thursday, y'all!! If you've been hangin' with me awhile, then you know what Thursdays mean...a fun day at the gym! (is that all I ever do, live at the gym & blog about it? I know, I need to get a life...)

So today was like every other Thursday, Body Combat class followed by Body Flow. Just sharing a few mental notes I took in class. Am starting to remember some of the terms of boxing, karate & muay thai a little more, so this helps me remember them.

Words to remember: "shoot" & "fake". The shoot is the...i think it's muay thai...move of lunging for the opponent's leg in front of you & yanking it up, I guess so they go crashing down on the floor. This is all with our invisible opponent, of course, (unfortunately) so you just have to use your imagination. Then he explains the "fake" by asking us how many of us had younger siblings whom we would jump out at them as if we were gonna attack, but then not. I couldn't raise my hand, as my 4 siblings are all older than me, but that means I had to work even harder to defend myself! :-) We actually even had a punching bag in our basement, so my 2 brothers could work off some steam when they needed to, but I never really used it.

Anyway, next word, "estiva"...? (is that right? need to look that one up, can expound upon that another time.

Next, "speedball", that rolling of the fists motion in the air, like you had a swinging punching bag by your head.

Another new move, a "power hook", I think it was...you do one normal one, then you lunge forward and smack 'em extra hard in the side of the head. Reason for power hook, in case you miss the first time, or they're not dead yet. :-)

Then it's Pink's "I'm not here for your entertainment" for the karate track. Can't share all the lyrics, but love the line, "You don't really want to mess with me tonight". Nope, not when I've got my karate back kick perfected!! Hooahhh!

"Mr. Bob" tells us about a comment someone left for him about this class.... "She wrote that it was a good class, she got a great work-out, but that she probably wouldn't be coming back again, it was just too AGGRESSIVE!!!!' HAHAHAHAHHA!!! The whole class had a good laugh at that, I mean, what did you expect, sistah, "prancercize"???

oh yeah, we BAD....

More Muay Thai.... that move I called the "lawn mower" is actually a "crawler", I learned today, burned it into my brain while Mr. Bob screamed, "GET CRAZY, MAD CARY MOMS!!!!!!"

Combination same as last time: stick jab, elbow jab, upper cuts and a big SHOVE forward kick.

I'm dying in here today...had to fake it for some of the moves, just to catch my breath, keep from passing out.

Next hour, cooling it down, stretching it out in Body Flow. Relax the mind, throw away your stress in the soothing motions of Tai Chi, hold that "energy ball"...keep your balance in yoga, yadda, yadda, yadda...

Just another Thursday.

But wait till tomorrow, kiddies, have I got a surprise for you! I am about to attempt something new & different, but you'll have to wait till tomorrow to find out what it is. Let's just say that, in the realm of getting fit & fierce, I kind of need to bump things up a notch. 'Course, if I wake up in too much pain tomorrow from today's workout, there may be no surprises, just a day on the couch. we'll see. :-)

over & out...

ping!