My Train Wreck Conversion
As a leftist lesbian professor, I despised Christians. Then I somehow became one.
So go ahead and read it, then come back here, ok?
I am sharing this article because it moved me for multiple reasons.
1. The woman was saved by Jesus' love, as demonstrated by people willing to love her as she is, not arguing Scripture or even trying to change her. They didn't try to send her subliminal "hints", they just loved her. They were patient and let her find her own truth, which was ultimately God's truth.
I try to avoid getting involved in the whole debate over homosexuality, as there’s already been too much talk on that topic. Talk, talk, talk. People will use the verses in Leviticus to show how the Old Testament was a lot about rules and practices that are no longer in use today. Others will bring up New Testament lists of sins, while others will argue that that same writer told women to cover their heads and men to cut their hair. And then there's that verse in Genesis that says simply, God created them male and female. and there i go, joining in the talk. Talk, argue, judge, hate, apologize, rationalize, defend. and talk some more. But what we really need to do is love. it's a verb. agape love. the kind of love they talk about here.
1. The woman was saved by Jesus' love, as demonstrated by people willing to love her as she is, not arguing Scripture or even trying to change her. They didn't try to send her subliminal "hints", they just loved her. They were patient and let her find her own truth, which was ultimately God's truth.
I try to avoid getting involved in the whole debate over homosexuality, as there’s already been too much talk on that topic. Talk, talk, talk. People will use the verses in Leviticus to show how the Old Testament was a lot about rules and practices that are no longer in use today. Others will bring up New Testament lists of sins, while others will argue that that same writer told women to cover their heads and men to cut their hair. And then there's that verse in Genesis that says simply, God created them male and female. and there i go, joining in the talk. Talk, argue, judge, hate, apologize, rationalize, defend. and talk some more. But what we really need to do is love. it's a verb. agape love. the kind of love they talk about here.
"she went deeper than the right or wrong, but moved by kindness she looked at the deeper issue of her identity."
That's what I call bypassing the letter of the law and moving with the spirit of the law instead. The law of kindness, that is. The spirit of love that Jesus used. God is amazing. And we are amazing creations, made in His image. wow. We are also very psychologically complex. God knows that full well. He sees our inmost being. Sometimes our inner beings get twisted in ways that make us behave in ways that others cannot understand. Yes, our twistedness will often lead us into sin. We all sin, even the lesser of the twisteds. But we all can love. So instead of judging by the letter of the law, we should be loving in the spirit of the law. Enough preaching. Time to make it personal. That brings me to my second reason for sharing, for why this article moved me so..
I hate getting personal. But where we choose to be vulnerable, that's where we get stronger. Not sharing inappropriately, but pushing past the fear of letting others see our true hearts. It's easy, oh so easy to write about, speak about what others should do with their lives. But when it comes to opening up and allowing others to see your heart, that's where we just want to yell "Awkward!!!" and go run and hide. Especially if it's something you're still dealing with, then you're especially vulnerable. It's one thing to share a hard experience in your past and how you learned from it, how you were saved from this thing by the blood of Jesus, hallelujah,, can i get an amen,.....it's quite another to say you're not there yet and are still searching for the answers. awkward, awkward.
ok, i'm still beating around that bush one more time, so here goes...
2. The second big reason this article hits home so much for me is...and i'll probably un-publish this post a few seconds after posting it...is..is... well let me tell you about my sister. I love my sister to death. She and I have been like twins, best friends, since forever. We're very much alike, both physically and how we're wired. Sometimes when we were kids, people would ask if we were twins. We think alike in so many ways, and even though we've had our share of crazy fights in the past, and we're now hundreds of miles apart, we can still hop right into deep conversations and get along like we're still living under the same roof as kids again. Just one big difference. She's a lesbian. I refuse to judge her, because I know her background, it is mine as well. I know how she is wired. I know she faces judgement from people on a daily basis, yet I see how she has allowed her being different make her stronger. She is not rude to those who do not agree with her. She always sees the good in people, no matter their differences, and she isn't afraid to tell them those good things. She inspires me to want to encourage people in my own life, to tell them things I admire about them, no matter how awkward it might seem. I can relate to this article because it is how I would want people to treat my sister. with love.
3. And my third reason...my sister is a lesbian. what? you say, I already said that? yes, I did. My sister is a lesbian, and because we are so close and similar, this article had implications for me as well. No, I am not a lesbian. Never was, never will be. Yet there are still ways about me that I do not fully understand, only God does, and He is working on me. I have made choices in the past based on how I thought I was, only to find out I was not who I thought I was. It's like, if something in you or something that happened to you makes you believe that you are a certain way, then you will make choices in life based on that belief. You will deny any other natural tendencies or attractions because you have yourself convinced otherwise, if only in your head. The brain is a powerful thing. Now since first coming up with that thought in the previous sentence, (i've been kicking this blog post around as a draft for weeks!) I have now discovered some new things about myself, weaknesses, areas of sin, emotional/psychological barriers I'm working through... that are helping me see things more clearly, live life more freely, the way it was intended. "I have come that they may have life, and have it abundantly," are the words Jesus used. (John 10:10) These new things I am learning only because they were presented to me in love. Not judgement, not subtle hints from strangers. I am still learning, still on this road to emotional wholeness, to living life from an honest, whole heart. Presenting myself, all of my self, to live out the life God has called me to. Getting all these "self" issues taken care of so I can get back to reaching out to others with honest love, serving others with all the gifts and abilities God has blessed me with.
That's why I shared this article, that's why we were all created. To live life with a whole heart, loving others the way Jesus did. amen!
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